Honk . . . Honk . . .  Honk! Hey! One of you go out on the porch and see who in the Sam Hill is honkin’ their honky tonkin’  horn in my driveway! I’m just flat too busy with the Biz Buzz and my handsome husband’s gonna get mad as a hornet if I don’t finish up right quick! Say what? Did you just tell me my Momma’s got two Billy goats in the back of her gas guzzlin’ pickup truck? Lord. Have. Double-Mercy! Momma! What in Saint Peter’s Gospel are you gonna do with those ding dang goats?  Now listen real close Momma.  The wheel’s just a turnin’, but the hamster’s done died! Died I say! Have you lost your ever-livin’ mind? You can’t harness up them goats to a wagon and trot around town like a frolickin’ fool to save gas money? I’ve never heard of such! Just put those two Billy goats out in the backyard for a spell and let’s discuss this rationally over a piece of famous Buttermilk Pie at Yesterday’s Café in Rutledge! You drive!

Now watch out for that Rutledge train crossin’!  Hummmm . . . I reckon the recession’s flat OVER ‘cause this is the longest doggone double-stacked-cargo train I have ever seen!  Finally! Downtown Rutledge has never looked prettier! Park right here in front of Rutledge Hardware and let’s go get that pie! What the? Momma! Do you see what I see in that there window? Unless my eyes are foolin’ me silly, The Barn Raising, located at 118 Fairplay St., in downtown Rutledge, has done got you a goat wagon! Let’s pop in and visit with owner Pam Jones and see if we can’t get you a deal on that wagon!

I kid y’all not! Pam’s got a bonafied, old fashioned goat wagon complete with a hand pull and goat yoke so we can harness up them goats and trot all around Morgan County! Yeehaw! I wanna ride in that goat wagon in the Christmas Parade! And, what’s this? Honey, Pam has a pair of antique Victorian fur boots . . . with fur on the outside and fur lined on the inside! Oh and I just love those ribbon ties! I flat love ‘em! Pam says women used to wear boots like this in the olden days when they rode around in their carriages on cold days! Well I reckon I should buy these boots for cold days in the goat wagon! This is the most fun shop ever! Pam’s got all kinds of things like Roy Rogers stuff from the 40s and 50s, handmade sterlin’ silver charms, old fashioned children’s tea sets and more! And, I’ve flat got to have that cute angel statue for my front porch! Ring it all up Pam!

Oh and I nearly forgot to tell y’all! Pam says Rutledge was just featured as WXIA’s 11 Alive’s Today Show Neighborhood Spotlight! Way to go Rutledge! You’re flat famous!

Hey and Pam’s husband Paul Jones who owns Rutledge Hardware at 116 Fairplay St., says his fall seeds and plants will be arrivin’ soon – within the next two weeks so y’all get ready for them collard seeds! Hey and pick you up some Rutledge-grown tomatoes when you visit!

Right! So I ran into Joe Diletto of The Wood Shop located on the Madison Markets campus at 274 West Washington St., in Madison and he said he’s fixin’ to move – oh in the next few weeks or so! I mean he’s movin’ into the old Wellington building located at 1140 Monticello Highway! Anyhow, he’s got lots of really great unfinished furniture upstairs in his current location that he’s sellin’ for half-off! I mean he don’t want to have to drag that stuff to the new location so y’all get over there immediately and check out the cool tables, chairs, chests and more! Check out his ad in next week’s paper!

Ok . . . now I have flat got to scat! The ding dang cutworms are reekin’ havoc in my garden and I’m aimin’ to kill ‘em in their tracks! Honey, they might even go after my peppers which I’ll need for the Oct. 3 Chili Cook Off that’s gonna take place in Town Park in downtown Madison! It’s gonna be the biggest EVER so y’all get up a team and you can try to beat my Hot Off The Presses team! Y’all sign up your team at

http://www.madisonga.com/site/page502.html! I ding dang know those Three Amigos with their fake redneck teeth are gonna show up! So come on y’all and join the fun! It’s a blast!

That’s it for the Buzz! Take it easy, breathe in that clean Morgan County air, make sure to appreciate the yellow cotton blooms all over the county and do all your shoppin’ the old fashioned way: LOCAL! I’ll see all y’all next week: Same time. Same Number One Weekly Newspaper in the Great State of Georgia! Now where’s that goat wagon? Momma hitch ‘em up!