Balloon Buzz. Momma! What in the Sam Hill are you doin’ sittin’ way up there drivin’ PawPaw’s John Deere? Oh. My. Ever. Livin’. Gosh! That tractor ain’t plowin’! Momma’s haulin’ a gigantic silver shiny helium balloon out the barn door! Trouble Alert! Trouble Alert! She must be doin’ some fancy dance weather experiment! Hey! Come on y’all! Grab those ropes holdin’ down the balloon! Momma! Get off that tractor and grab a rope! Hey! Why ain’t y’all helpin’? What the? I’m flyin’ like the wind! Clackin’ Crows! The balloon’s gainin’ altitude! HELP! Hey! Who called that CNN Chopper? I’m gonna be famous if I come outta this alive! Maybe I can even snag my very own Redneck Biz Buzz Reality TV Show! Perf! Yikes! I’m losin’ my grip on this ding dang balloon rope! The wind’s picked up a spell and I’m flyin’ in fast over the James Madison Inn where famous movie star Brooke Shields stayed week before last! Must. Hold. On. For. Pond. Landin’. Behind. Town 220! There’s the pond! Time to let loose! Bombs Away! SPLASH DOWN! 

The Balloon’s still travelin’ towards Rutledge! Hey! Momma had somethin’ monogrammed on that crazy balloon! Hand me those binoculars immediately! Let’s see . . .  it says:  “Clip Crazy Coupons at   www.morgancountycitizen.com!” That reminds me! I’ve gotta Crazy Coupon for Tequila Express in my wet pocket! Perf! Buy one get one half off! Can’t beat that deal! Oh and honey check out Town 220’s two-for-one crazy coupon deal on Wednesday nights! It’s slap yo momma good and I oughtta know! Hey! There’s even a coupon for The Madison Café! Ten percent off! Yummy! Whoa! And, Amici’s Italian Café too! Buy one get one half off! Now that’s good!

It’s a good thing Mark It Embroidery & Personalized Gifts opened before Momma’s Balloon Launch. That’s right y’all! Mark It is located at 211 West Jefferson St., in Madison across from our beautiful Town Park and right smack down from Petals Salon! I popped over there the other day and met owner Jeanie Cottrell and she wanted me to tell all y’all that she’ll embroider on Your garments or she can special order a wide range of garments, bags, hats, shirts, blankets, towels, you name it honey! Mark It can personalize just ‘bout any ding dang thang! There’s no minimum order either! Y’all head on over to Mark It and check it all out!

Did somebody turn up the heat? Y’all have just got to check out the new jewelry line at Whidby Jewelers located at 177 West Jefferson Street in Madison! It’s called Hot Diamonds and features a vast assortment of sterlin’ silver jewelry with each piece accented with fab diamonds! Hot Diamond necklaces, earrings, bracelets and even lockets are charming and sophisticated all at the same time! Whidby Jewelers owner and Madisonian Ben Whidby showed me the entire line and y’all are flat gonna flip! The best part is the price! These are super fantastic stockin’ stuffers and this line starts at only $79! The perf gift! Oh and Ben’s just gettin’ in all kinds of new, spectacularly sparklin’ pieces like these 14k gold hoops with diamonds on the outside and on the inside of the hoop! I’ve flat gotta have ‘em immediately! And, I need y’all’s help! Ben’s got somethin’ real BIG up his sleeve planned for December but he won’t tell a ding dang soul! Keep watchin’ this column for more info on this December Surprise! I’m gonna put Momma on the case!

Deals! Deals! Deals! That’s right y’all! The Bag-A-Bargain Yard Sale Spectacular is slated for Oct. 30 and Oct. 31 at the Madison-Morgan Cultural Center located on Main Street in Madison! This is gonna be a Bargain Blast y’all ‘cause we’re gonna find all kinds of great stuff! To make a tax deductible donation, just call the Center at 706-342-4743! The best part is that all proceeds benefit the Center’s new film series Southern Circuit Tour of Independent Filmmakers! Check it out at  www.mmcc-arts.org! Ok so on Oct. 30 y’all come on out from 6 p.m. until 9 p.m. for the Sneak Peek with refreshments for only $5 per person and a live auction beginnin’ at 7:30. On Oct. 31 Bag-A-Bargain is open from 8 a.m. until 3 p.m. with no entry fee! Be there!

High School Musical. Honey, I just flat got off the phone with the Madison ChopHouse Grille’s famous Faye Craft of Bostwick and she wants me to remind all y’all to come out to the Laura Margaret Burbach Benefit Night at the ChopHouse this Thursday night, Oct. 22 from 5 p.m. until closin’! Right! So the Chop House has partnered with Morgan County High School kids to put on a great night with an auction featuring all kinds of tickets to sportin’ events and great items like a Brighten purse! Also 10 percent of all sales at the Chop House will go towards a fund set up for Laura Margaret, who is awaiting a lung transplant at Duke Medical Center in Durham, N.C. Live entertainment will feature all the star performers from Morgan County High School! I’ll see all y’all there and don’t forget to bring your Crazy Coupon for the Madison ChopHouse! Go to  www.morgancountycitizen.com and click on the Crazy Coupon button then select the coupon you want and . . . . Presto!

Ok y’all that’s it for the Buzz! Y’all be good, clip your Crazy Coupons, shop local and I’ll see all y’all next week: Same time. Same Number One Weekly Newspaper in the Great State of Georgia!