Vertigo. Momma! We are fearless adventurers in the best, buff shape of our lives! Yes! We’re gonna conquer the cliff and climb the world’s most difficult climb! Red Bull is even sponsorin’ us! Momma pop me another can of that Red Bull with a hit of White Lightnin’! Perf! That hits the spot! Let’s go! The FISCAL CLIFF is just awaitin’! Ding dang! We’re half way to the top! Momma! Stop pullin’ on the rope or I’m gonna flat fall and take you with me! Stop the presses! What’s that? Eeeeeh. Eeeeh. Eeeeh! Shootfire! It’s a mean maniac mountain goat! Help! Cut the rope! He’s headed straight for meeeeeeee! Splat! What the? I ain’t hurt! My backpack buffered the blow! Let’s go back to the drawin’ board and get some proper trainin’!
And, honey nobody knows more ‘bout the Fiscal Cliff than financial advisor Mark Bowers of Edward Jones in downtown Madison! In a nutshell, Mark says the best way to avoid extreme volatility is to build your portfolio so that it can withstand uncertainty! First, he says to make sure your portfolio is diversified across a broad range of investment types from equity/stocks, bonds and short-term investments like money markets and certificates of deposit.  “The stock market doesn’t like uncertainty,” says Mark. But, he says if you have a more diverse, balanced portfolio uncertainty doesn’t have a huge effect on your finances. About the Fiscal Cliff, Mark is optimistic that the U.S. Congress and the administration will come to a compromise or even may vote to extend the tax cuts. And, he acknowledges the Fiscal Cliff does pose a threat. “It will affect everybody” because it will affect income taxes, estate taxes and capital gains. But he cautions: “Don’t make decisions on emotions.” Mark says our economy has seen uncertainty like this before. “I’ve done this rodeo before.” Besides, Mark says 2013 will likely be the same economy as 2012. As to the bottom line: “I believe we’ll see slow growth but I don’t see another recession. I think at the last hour, they (U.S. Congress) will extend or find a compromise to the fiscal cliff. I’m optimistic. There are so many business people with great talent. If you’ll give them the incentive, they’ll employ people, build businesses and make it work! If you want to speak with Mark about your own financial portfolio, just give him a call at Edward Jones at 706-342-9938!
And speakin’ of businesses, there’s a new one comin’ to town! I’m talkin’ ‘bout a new restaurant on Main Street in downtown Madison! That’s right y’all! Kenny Pritchett is at it again! Kenny has  rented the space that used to be occupied by Eenoco/Madison Ale House and plans to operate two Madison restaurants! He’s already operatin’ the popular Chowder House on North Main Street in Madison! OK so if ya’ll don’t know, Kenny and Linda opened O’Hara’s in that same exact spot in 2000 and it was def one of my most fave restaurant! Well here’s what we know so far: Kenny’s plannin’ on openin’ in two weeks for breakfast/brunch and lunch to begin with and will hopefully add dinner later. Plus he’s plannin’ on startin’ with beer and wine! OK so he doesn’t know yet if he’s gonna call it O’Hara’s but I sure hope he does ‘cause some retailers say people still come by wonderin’ where O’Hara’s is located!  Anyhow Kenny promised he was gonna serve up his famous steamed shrimp, eggs benedict, burgers, salads, soups and grilled entrees but we’ll know more later! Y’all keep watchin’ the Buzz for more on this yummy story!
And, speakin’ of yummy! Honey Harris Warbington is cookin’ up somethin’ new at El Sol/H.Porkington and that is this: Breakfast! You flat heard me right y’all! I’m talkin’ H. Porkington is now servin’ breakfast Monday through Saturday 6 a.m. til 11 a.m. with full breakfast service! I’m talkin’ western omelets, pancakes, waffles, French toast, biscuits and gravy and more, more more! Oh and you get FREE coffee with a full breakfast! Y’all get up early and head over there immediately to 171 West Washington St., in downtown Madison! See you there!
Tour, Tour, Tour! Y’all get ready honey ‘cause if history is a guide we’re flat in for big crowds for the Christmas Tour this weekend on Friday and Saturday! Check out the fab, fab, fab the Morgan County Citizen’s tour supplement in this week’s newspaper! It’s flat gorgeous and highlights all of the beautiful tour sites but also LOCAL SHOPS AND RESTAURANTS! Not only is this supplement the largest in terms of ad sales that we’ve EVER PRODUCED, but we are printing the most we’ve ever printed – a total of 8,000! That’s right! Some 5,000 are inserted in the newspaper and 3,000 will be handed out! A big thanks goes out to our advertisers who made it possible to produce a special piece that promotes Madison and Morgan County! Jesse Walker, Citizen Photographer extraordinaire, took the photos for this year’s supplement too!
OK that’s it for the Buzz! Y’all know the drill this Christmas Season: SHOP LOCAL, LOCAL, LOCAL! Be good and I’ll see all y’all next week!

Printed in the November 29, 2012 edition.