Best of the Best: State-Of-The-Porch Address

Editor Best of the Best Leave a Comment

It’s time again for the State-of-the-Porch Address. If you remember, last year, at this time, I shared my “Shattered Vision” of porch life amongst the pines. For weeks, pollen count and porch furniture consumed my every waking thought. Every time I glanced at the porch, through pollen-powdered windows, a nervous twitch began, and then sneezing, lots of sneezing. Pollen, mildew, teak, and cushions did not, and will not, geehaw. This spring is no different; my pollen obsession commenced to escalate. I began chattering, incoherently, to my eldest son about the state-of-the-porch. With his father still shoveling snow in Wisconsin, he agreed to help me secure the porch furniture, before the pine began to pop. With razor sharp timing, my astute son arrived on sight exactly two days before this spring’s pollen onslaught. Once again, he patiently listened to me chatter about all options for pollen proofing 9 pieces of teak, 19 cushions, three large pillows and five accent pillows. And, if that’s not enough, this winter we added a teak dining table and 6 chairs with cushions. Ridiculous! When I caught my breath, my, think-outside-the-box, brilliant son came up with the ultimate solution. Surveying an almost imperceptible dusting, he declares we abort covering the plethora of furnishings, and reduce the mildew risk by storing all furniture, with cushions, on one side of our two-car garage. His reasoning…this is the brilliant part…it’s easier to wash your car, mom, than all this stuff. To top it off, he lugged every dang piece, cushions and all, off the porch and in to their 6-week resting place. How can I love him more?

Did I mention how strong my brilliant son is? For the record, he’s strong. I’m not sure if it’s possible for you to understand how happy I am about this. The garage option never once occurred to me. Not once. In one spectacular moment of brilliance, my brilliant son cut solid days of porch labor down to a 30-minute power wash. The best part is: I never, ever, have to obsess over pollen again… ever. Done. Just so you know, the only thing more ridiculous than my pollen obsession, and glut of furniture, is witnessing me dancing my happy dance, to Pharrell’s Happy song, in my pollen-powdered car. Follow on: Twitter @cbestdiscovery, Instagram @cbestdiscovery @ watertowerlandmarks, @cathygbest. Share what you’ve discovered @bestdiscovery@aol.com

Leave a Reply